Bright colours and structures - All the polymer clay

I already showed you the pink and purple version of these beads. Here are another pair I made in this shape. I really like the shape but still one has to be very careful about how thick the polymer clay should be to ensure stability of the bead. I worked with fimo (an effect colour but you can't see it anymore ^^But it is important for all colour effects!). 

And going more into shades of purple and blue. Also with a little bit of pearl shimmer because of the colour of the fimo I used. It is subtle but it is there!

I layered my structures after painting with liquid polymer clay (also fimo) and the added several layers of shiny gloss. This creates this so glas like surface. At a little closer view you may see some of the shine and shimmer of the clay. 

I also want this earring pair to be my part of the AJE challenge this week. Even if I love the green ones, they would be a repetition of my earrings last week. 

There are still a lot of beads waiting to be integrated into earrings... and even more to be the center part of a necklace. But somehow creating necklaces takes me a lot more time. Quite often I stop in the middle of the process just because something I want to be included, maybe just a special kind of jump ring, is missing... not good. But I try to challenge myself more. ^^

Inspirations: Sea (South Korea)

Just a moment at the south of Korea. Late afternoon. Last day of march.

Inspirations: Find the heart! (Gwangju, South Korea)

I am not the biggest (or rather no) fan of valentines day. Don't get me wrong, I also don't have anything against it. It just has no personal meaning for me. But when I saw this construction site in gwangju I thought: This would make such a nice valentines day card! ^^

Painted cup - swallow

This cup had a big brand sign of a company at the side. When I stumbled over some porcelain pens in black at a reduced price, I took them to try to cover the brand logo. This is why the swallow is rather a big one, the bird had to cover a broad space. A very fast little project :)

I have several cups with brand logos on them. Not that I like that but quite often I like the shape f the cup itself. This is sometimes even more important for me than the look. Now I may just repaint all of them!

New structures and shapes - some polymer clay stuff again, finally!

It took me a while to get back into the day/night rhythm here in germany. Also my new working / crafting room is still in a state of pure chaos. But I just ached to make things again! Thankfully I can now take part at the AJE challenge as well as their connected collection on pinterest! Hey, that just means I have to pull out my wire and polymer clay (fimo classic) and acrylic paints...! ^^ 
This is my first pair of earrings for the AJE made with polymer clay beads made by me. Can you see the structures and layers of paint? All covered with liquid polymer clay (fimo) and shiny gloss.

The earring challenge from AJE (art jewelry elements, have a look!)

I made some new structure stamps in korea with some strange air drying clay. This clay was very soft and smooth. I don't have anything elft from this clay but it works so great for polymer clay: I really need more! I have to see if I can find it or something similar here in germany. Better than anything else I tried and this includes silicon molds! 
Also I played with new (for me new) shapes. Have a look at my working table :)

Yea, there also will be a green version of this earrings!

I am creating earrings most of the time. Therefor my personal challenge would be to start cresting more necklaces. Here are some of the focals I made and want to use.

I am still not sure what to make out of these but I know I will have to make more of them! The strange shapes has something quite fascinating for me.

...of course more earring studs...

Most of the studs I make I never show you because I always forget to take pictures before they are sold. 

Inspirations: Just smile! (Leipzig)

First real day of spring! Not only did the sun come out and the temperatures were nice, no... also most of the trees showed the first new and fresh green leaves! It made me see als the small things around me again like the smile, like the cat :)

Inspirations: A drop of colour (Gwangju, South Korea)

Next to Gwangju is a national park called after the highest mountain there: Mudeung (no, it is not pronounced like it is written in latin letters ^^  Mudeung mountain - 무등산). From the apartment where I stayed it was only five minutes with the bus to go there. I like to explore my surroundings as well as going out in the nature so of course I went there at the weekend. But I got a little cultural shock at my first time! See, during a sunday you can find some young people downton but otherwise the city seems to be sleeping and empty. And there are really no people around because I found them all: At Mudeung mountain! So unbelieveable crowded! 

There I found the first signs of spring as well as this little bird with colours which just pop out against the leafless trees. My digital camera is not the best to take pictures from moving objects (also already several years old... and while I love her, she seems to develop some problems *sigh*) I was able to capture him!

Newspapers, paint and thread!

I had to start creating things. I just brought some needles and thread, crochet hooks and yarn with me. I can do a lot with that kind of supplies but... it really couldn't occupy my mind enough. It took me some time but I found some great air-drying clay (it has a really strange consistency... and now I know why they don't use polymer clay here... most apartment don't have an oven. They are cooking and frying a lot but they usually don't bake in korea). I will show you what I made with it in the next days. Still have to finish the painting. 

But... with some newspapers lying around.. and some cardbord from the cereal box... I started playing around. Some paper beads, some cut outs (still just single pieces, nothing done with it yet) and this card! And... mh... I bough three copics and a white laquer pen ^^

The shape of the butterfly was roughly sketched on the newspaper. The several layers were sewn together to create the body. Afterwards I cut the shape out. The rest was playing with scribbling, doodling and painting all over. The butterfly was then glued on the card. 

Can you see all the layers? The effect is really something which I will repeat in the future!

And it is already on its way to germany. Next to this card I played a little bit with blank envelopes. Just with the new pens... To doodle around is quite relaxing. All of them are also on their way to germany... and next tuesday I will also head home.

Inspirations: Wake up! (Hwasun, South Korea)

Look who crossed my way! Here everything is starting to grow. The first flowers are everywhere to be seen, little dots of colours next to the grey The sun shines and my coat is already way too warm!

This one was still a little bit confused (he actually jumped on my shoe and then panicked ^^) but I also need my time after I wake up...

Thanks for all your words and thoughts in the comments and in the emails you send me. Everything needs its time. Even (or maybe especially) sorrow.

Sometimes the pain goes deep

I know I didn't write anything for a long time now. I just couldn't. Sometimes it needs all the energy to go on, to keep oneself together...

Most people can't understand what I was and still am feeling. One of my little ones, of my black cats died while I am still here in korea. Dean. He was perfectly healthy and it was just some kind of accident. What really happened we will never know. Just that he was in pain, he even bite Rumpel and then he was not really moving anymore. Rumpel and sun-lost (my former flatmate, it was his mother who brought the cats as little lost 4 week old nearly dead babies to us 12 years ago) took him to the doctor (the best one around Leipzig, even if he was helpless this time he already saved so many beloved animals from friends as well as mine... even from mistakes other doctors or even the clinic made). He said there is nothing he could do anymore, just to end the pain.

I was not there.

There is not much more to say. I know that we saved their life so many years ago and he had a good life. Still I feel guilty like... I should have played more with him, pet him more, especially because all of our cats were stressed due to moving into a new apartment over new year.

But I know that the day before the accident happened he was cuddling with Rumpel (even if Rumpel is allergic), lying next to him on the sofa. Dean was the one who recovered quite fast from the move, the one who finally got on the top of the food chain of my three cats. Normally he was at the bottom.

Just writing this sends me back to tears.

I had to read about his death in an email. It was not really possible to get me at the phone here in korea and Rumpel had to go to the hospital because Dean bite him in the hand. They had to operate his hand therefore he had to stay several days in the hospital and they don't have internet access there. Not the best time for him, for me or for us. I was so worried about him and so sad about the loss of Dean.

They say time heals all pain. I am sorry to say that this is not true. It is just that it is not at the front anymore. You don't think so often anymore of the reason for the pain. You also can smile at the good memories again. But in the moments you remember, the pain is back with all force. My mother died about ten years ago. It was cancer. And still, just hearing a certain song and all the memory of her as well as the pain is back.

A lot of people can't understand how deeply I love my cats. For them there are just pets. Some people are even shocked by the idea that you could love an animal so much. I fought for their lives so long ago and somehow along the way they also saved me. During all the really hard times in the last years, during the times when the wall between me and the rest of the world made me speechless, they were there. Bisu, Grusel and of course Dean. (some of my pictures from them: Dean, Grusel, Bisu) It may sound a little bit hard, but nobody is allowed to judge me on how and how deep I should feel. How much of pain and how many tears are okay and what is "too much" regarding to a pet. Dean was one of my little ones, my little beloved black ones.

It will be so strange coming back home and Dean won't be there to welcome me.